Narcissistic father reddit. 2K votes, 123 comments.
Narcissistic father reddit Because of this, I rarely tell my parents deep/important issues but I sometimes find myself opening up to people outside my family The enabler is arguably the worst part of having narcissistic parents because that’s how the narc can keep abusing on a permanent basis. She still lives with them and so does her new husband. My narcissistic mother recruited my enabling father to her side. Well good thing you've got a lovely sister by the sound of it. Examples of A couple years later, I confronted my father about things that had happened in the past and tried to tell him how they affected me. But she can't find the resolve nor the support to leave. A narcissist that has become self-aware is absolutely capable of developing their ability to reflection on themselves and their actions. The older a narcissist gets, the more energy that is required to maintain the facade. Once they have something to control, they can use you as a resource endlessly. 2K votes, 123 comments. He’s gaslit me throughout my life, mocked me for expressing my opinions and feelings, lied to me, and cannot for the life of him accept any form of criticism. I've wondered exactly what was wrong with him for years and only found this category through watching Dr Ramani. Jul 26, 2017 · For some people, the community Reddit's raisedbyNarcissist's subreddit provides is life-changing. None. A support group for people raised by abusive parents with narcissistic traits. No one in life has been crueler than him, even when I was more vulnerable and would put up with mistreatment from others, I'd heard so much awful shit from him and my narc sister, in the back of my head I'd A narcissistic parent is a parent affected by narcissism or narcissistic personality disorder. Long story short, I stopped talking to my father in 2019 and reopened the dialogue in 2023. It took me a little while to accept this, as I was reluctant to blame anyone but myself. I want to know your experiences. My older sibling thinks the same. I grew up with a narcissistic father and a schizophrenic mother. Narcissist love having that constant source of narcissistic supply. My narcissistic father claims that fathers deserve total and unconditional respect. The passive father is sometimes seen as the "good guy" but really his narcissism is there but not that obvious. Wow, as someone whose really only just worked out my parents were abusive and narcissistic, I read your comment about spilling milk and just had this crazy vivid memory. She says she loves me, gives me cute little gifts and cards sometimes, and helps me out financially while I’m currently pursuing my second degree. Check out our Helpful Links for information on how to deal with identity theft, how to get independent of your n-parents, how to apply for FAFSA, how to identify n-parents and SO MUCH MORE! This is a reminder to all participants, RBN is a support group that is moderated very strictly. I wanted a healthy father-daughter relationship, but he only wanted someone to manipulate, and I wasn’t interested in filling that role. Do you think narcissistic parents truly love their children? My mother is a narcissist. I start to think that I should not have gotten married because sometimes I don’t act right with my husband. He had hair trigger narcissistic rage that could be brought on by something as simple as someone breathing wrong. That releases a lot of resentment and burden. I continually ask my mom about my childhood, and what I was like growing up, because I eventually want a diagnosis, and I know they ask about your behavior as a kid. I wish he never had come here so it wouldn’t have happened. Narcs are the only type of abusive parents that do the opposite, actively trying to hurt their kids on those special occasions. I wanted to create this post to see of any of us could share how we learned or are learning to set boundaries with our narcissistic parents. Since no one is diagnosed with narcissism. Advice from a person who's dealt with an Narcissistic mother: hello friend. Users share their experiences and stories of how their parents made noise to get attention, such as sighing, yelling, slamming, and talking loudly. This is a support group for people raised by abusive parents (with toxic, self-absorbed or abusive personality traits, which may be exhibited by those who suffer from cluster B personality disorders). My narcissistic parents do this all the time aswell (even my narc and gc sister). Recent studies confirm that narcissistic parents are incapable of truly loving others, even their own children. Many of them don't want to see you happy and flourishing because they are miserable and think you shouldn't elevate yourself above them. Currently I stay in a seperate apartment upstairs in the same building. It really got to me that I never got a parent to stand up for me. Narc parents will tell you, "You can come to me/tell me about ANYTHING!" But when you do, they dont understand, ignore your emotional well being, or just explode and chastise you. He felt so extremely humiliated. Narcissistic parents parentify their children and thus throw them defencelessly to the wolves to be eaten, which is why these children are frozen with fear. Maybe once a year I'll text. My relationship with my dad is toxic - I have no doubt about that. The only way out for a while was by doing year-round sports. My dad is a narcissist who wields his over confidence, and my mom is a narcissist with a black hole of insecurities. After a while he said, that he suspects my mom to be a covert narcissist as she matches some criteria and they usually have children with bpd I’ve been reading some of your posts today and they really saddened me. Mar 15, 2021 · Narcissistic parents tend to be highly possessive of their children and feel the need to control their activities in such a way that the time spent away from the home and in the company of other Both of my parents are narcs in their own ways, like you described, and both enable one another. He would never get a job, never would watch me or my brother. And would never lift a finger to help with the house work. Mar 18, 2024 · The label narcissist is used loosely these days, typically to indicate anyone who is vain and selfish, but the actual, diagnosable personality disorder and its traits run much deeper and carry The point I am making is, Narcissistic abuse is something that wears you down over time, you lose self worth and energy to fight these people so you can get stuck because how are you to be investing in yourself since all you focus on the dysfunctional problems and abuse and depression. I'm healthier and happier. Whether it be for financial or emotional gain you are right there for them and you can't leave. My parents don't know about this, and I am depressed ever since. After reading some of these replies, I could definitely see them both on the spectrum. true. When I was 13 I had my first boyfriend and he turned out to be extremely abusive. But growing up, I also had a very severely nSister who goes beyond narcissism and into some realms of anti-social (I think, I am just going based off of my therapist's opinion, who also says she can't give a genuine diagnosis without meeting them). I completely believe both of my parents to be narcissistic, though at different spectrum. Her father is a very difficult person; he thinks he knows everything, he has very narcissistic traits, (although I do not know if he meets all the criteria for being narcissitic), he is a control freak and wants things always done his way, and if they are not, he is easily insulted/offended and could throw a tantrum. . Any man who has sired a child is a father, but only a man who raises and supports his child is a dad. He died about 7 years ago which probably helped me to see my mother more clearly (among other things). Reading posts in this sub has been eye opening, but i’m still in doubt if this was the case in my childhood. Typically, narcissistic parents are exclusively and possessively close to their children and are threatened by their children growing independent. Anyway, we don't have to stay stuck. With time I’ve been realizing that being raised by a narcissist means you’re set up to lose in life from an early age. Of course environment and parents are a big factor in what help you get and how long it can take until someone acknowledge the adhd and you get the tools to deal with it on a day This is a support group for people raised by abusive parents (with toxic, self-absorbed or abusive personality traits, which may be exhibited by those who suffer from cluster B personality disorders). I won't go into too much detail for the sake of keeping this post brief. That's a common fallacy. So my mother had to do everything, on Top of her full time job. Younger bro is an abusive narcissist, older bro is married to an abusive narcissistI keep my corner clean and drama free. I refer to my father as my NDad because it's shorter, although dads are not the same as fathers. NMom created the triangle we live by. A pure narcissist doesn't see a problem with their actions. Their parents are pretty much the same as them, just more mature. My evil narcissistic psychopath brother was the cause I moved out when I was 23 and spent a decade away from home, great years of personal growth. I clicked the discussion, explored the sub, and found it really disturbing and enlightening. It’s easy to understand why children of narcissistic parents My therapist told me that my father most probably has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. A narcissist is someone who is deeply self-involved, controlling, manipulative, secretive, highly insecure and intimacy-avoidant. It can I have a narcissistic father, hands down, text book nDad. 25 votes, 12 comments. I've been in therapy for several months to deal with depression and anxiety, which, in part, is related to a narcissistic father. This doesn't surprise me one bit. My mother and father haven't been together since I was young. TD;LR à Narcissistic parent mistreated me my whole life. Since my parents divorced when I was young, and my mother remarried (twice), it was really convenient to point all negative family drama in the direction of my father. Because being a mother or father is always going to be difficult and is never easy. That probably made him better equipped to recognise our parents' behaviour when it changed toward him. I wonder how much of her financial problems stem from her narcissistic personality. Her parents are well into their 70s and the house is in disrepair everywhere you look. I said goodbye and, more than a year later, have never had a moment of regret about it. And knowing what kind of loser he is (has literally 0 friends cause nobody likes him, is an alcoholic, etc) I just feel so extremely sorry for him. I wanted to share how I came to the conclusion myself that my mom is a narcissist. I have a narcissist father, part of it being a generational/cultural thing and the other half just him having a lot of repressed trauma that he has never faced and just thinks there is nothing wrong with his behavior. I could not make peace with my father, but I could make peace with the absence of my father. But put the blame on themselfs. I just recently uncovered her mask. my dad, being an athlete, avoided my brother; who hated sports/activities; and spent most of his time with me (who loved anything This is a support group for people raised by abusive parents (with toxic, self-absorbed or abusive personality traits, which may be exhibited by those who suffer from cluster B personality disorders). It explained to me how my sister and I, who both grew up with two narcissistic parents, have such different outcomes in my life: my sister was still my father's golden child, while I was both parents' scapegoat. So as my E constantly smoothed the way for the narc, abusive episodes were completely ignored or given excuses “had a bad childhood/just his way/doesn’t mean it”. We own it and my father understands, so. Because the narcissist chose themselfs to be parent. He was the golden child until our sister came along. Her neglectful narcissist videos made a light bulb go off in my brain. Just think about what terrible shit she would've heard about you for all those years, how you were the worst son ever and how you ruined their lives (I'm just assuming this would've been said due to how you're parents seem as people and personal experience). They have the ability and the RESPONSIBILITY to protect their children from harm. How do I deal with my extremely narcissistic father? Ever since I was a kid my father was never around much he worked abroad and I grew up with the "nice face" he'd put on when he'd come visit us with gifts and stuff. I can't speak about the grandfathers parents since I've never heard any stories about them. True to his narcissistic self, my father gaslit me and told me that therapists are worthless and all they ever do is try to blame the parents for everything. My children are each other's best friend, whereas I haven't voluntarily spoken with either of my brothers for decades. Feb 2, 2024 · Whether a person has a diagnosis of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) or only a few narcissistic characteristics, those traits can influence important relationships in their life. I've always been the narcissistic supply for my parents. Not the usual “ spanking” kind of stuff. It was from the bank. Instead of developing in height (which was too dangerous), these children maximized their existence in width (which was safer), they built their childlike existence in place to somehow May 27, 2021 · Narcissistic parents often send others out as their emissaries to guilt adult children back into an unhealthy dynamic. ME TOO!!!!! Wow!!!!! I’m a newbie here!!! Looking for info re 2 narcissistic parents as I was late diagnosed with autism…I’m 60!! Both my parents are uber narcissistic and so believe they are right about everything!! I’d love to find an online or in person support group for women like me: Autistic Narcissist parents CPTSD Nov 21, 2024 · The first step to healing from the abuse of a narcissistic father is realizing he’s a narcissist. For years I have always considered my parents to be overly strict, but in the last couple of years I have realised that my dad is extremely controlling and borderline narcissistic. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. She also ruined my and my siblings credit when we were young and still denies it to this day but we all know it was her. My father used to mock me for having a menstrual cycle. The relationship lasted 3 years. What made me realize my dad was a narcissist is seeing a link to this sub on the front page, where someone was describing behavior that was pretty much identical to something my dad would do. Since my childhood he always treated me as a stupid person while treating my sister as the smartest person, he once said and admitted to me that he thinks I am stupid although I I have huge memory gaps. There was no way for her to really know me. But even more than that sometimes he would do things to flat out humiliate me by using my menstrual cycle Something wrong with the bonding between them and their parents . I am 23, living at home with my siblings and parents. But just know this is bullshit. But there is something wrong with their relationship with their parents. Find the support for your parents to lean on when you've gone and slowly ease them onto it. Narcissistic parents project their fear, pain and inadequacies onto you because their parents did it to them. Even crappy, neglectful parents try to make their kids’ birthdays nice. How do you know if your parent is a real narcissist or if your parent is just traumatized from their childhood and developed a strong defense mechanism? If the parent is a narcissist, can the person change for the better and become a better parent? Jun 5, 2024 · While they are titled traits specific to mothers, fathers can have these same traits. He might have fun with the kids but won't stand up for them when their mother goes batshit crazy and abusive. There is a distinct difference between a father and a dad. If you suspect you have a narcissistic mother or father, you may be wondering how to deal with them in order to preserve both your well-being and your relationship with them. I recently learned from my grandma that she also tried to cash fraudulent checks from her own fathers account when she was 18. Grew up with an extremely narcissist step-dad who poisons my family with his Jul 18, 2024 · My (32f) father is a covert narcissist. My (F 37) father (78 M) is a malignant narcissist, (undiagnosed like most but he fits the DSM definition like a glove). Not only do I see my mother in a more realistic way, but I also see my entire family system for what it was. Mar 23, 2024 · Growing up with narcissistic parents can have a profound impact on children, leading to overwhelming feelings of guilt, shame and emotional distress. Hi everyone. My father is the textbook example, he rages, diminishes people, self-centered, etc. I tried to kill myself too, last month, unsuccessful, ovio. These feelings can later manifest in their This is a support group for people raised by abusive parents (with toxic, self-absorbed or abusive personality traits, which may be exhibited by those who suffer from cluster B personality disorders). My parents admit to realizing this was going on but never did anything to help me. It doesn't help that my gc brother also enables them, often picks sides against me, flying monkeys for them and does other narcissistic/fleas things. I have stories that deserve their own post they are so absurd. Back than no-one was that much into narcissistic personality disorder so I had no clue what he tried to tell me. When you read about the signs of a narcissistic father, you’ll realize that the things you thought were ‘normal parenting’ were indeed unhealthy Jan 9, 2023 · Narcissistic personality disordered parents groom their children to accept their control and abuse by deliberately undermining their confidence in their own feelings and perceptions. A lot of you are young people who are stuck living with your narcissistic parents at the moment. 2. Your points are only just starting to come through with me, when I left home, I couldn't do conflict, and all through school, I could never stick up for myself because at home Many people come across this subreddit, trying to figure out if their parent is a narcissist. Ooo, I have an easy sign: they hate their birthdays (when they’re too young to hate turning older, that is). A narcissist sibling is worse than a narcissist parent because they have the youth and strenght to make people's life miserable for years and years to come. After my mother died, my father quickly started dating the woman he was likely cheating on my dying mother with (rumor and suspicious behavior have it). One day she was ironing one of his jackets and a letter fell out. On the other hand, it’s still my father. I've never posted before and I'm really nervous to post this question but if you are a daughter of a narcissistic father I need to ask if this ever happened to you. They are rich, spoiled with gifts and don't get physically abused. Obviously narcissistic parents are directly causing the abuse, but enabler parents have the ability to remove their children from an abusive situation. If they are anything like my mother, they will deny that anything is ever wrong with their child, simply because they are their child. My father was physically abusive. Check out our Helpful Links for information on how to deal with identify theft, how to get independent of your n-parents, how to apply for FAFSA, how to identify n-parents and SO MUCH MORE! This is a reminder to all participants, RBN is a support group that is moderated very strictly. My understanding is that when a narcissist collapses, they lash out, and all of their worst traits become amplified. But not only that, but I live with a narcissist, sociopath, and a psychopath. Doesn't mean it's a quick or easy thing to do, but the amount of narcissists here that are working on this should prove that is absolutely possible, if person w Both of my parents are absolutely textbook narcissists (NPD), and each in a different way. According to the Mayo Clinic, narcissistic personality disorder is defined as “a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for admiration and a lack of empathy for others. Please share your stories, your questions, your histories, your fears and your triumphs. 5 years younger, often tells me about things that happened during our childhood (in relation to our parents) and I have no memory. There are quite a few times I remember him losing his shit and hurting my brother and I. I have a similar story without the physical abuse and it's my mother instead of my father. After reading and watching numerous information about it, all the symptoms line up, including my own as a victim of narcissistic abuse. I've always suspected with my dad. For example, I know a narcissist who on the outside , has everything. But i have to say that dealing with the psychopath was the hardest. Horrible narcissistic father, E/covert narc mother. TLDR; My very abusive and narcissistic parents have started stirring up a bunch of drama, and I am in such grief trying to handle cutting them out, and just seeking advice, experiences, words of wisdom. I have to admit, it is hard dealing with a narcissist. I was the youngest ( and female) so I got the worst of it (when it comes to my narcissistic father) compared to my brother who grew up with un-diagnosed Asperger's and spent most of his life hiding in his room. Yes, but my father is a neglectful narcissist, not a ragey one. Growing up, we may learn how to play along with a narcissistic parent’s She was a full-blown narcissist, and she never saw me as anything more than a scapegoat and reflection of what she wanted to see. So the narcissist shouldn’t put the blame on you. Both parents were college athletes, so we were expected to be doing at LEAST two sports at once at any point of the year. Growing up, i never understood why my own father would always have this vendetta against me, want me to do well in life (but never better than him), make me question why i was even born, and go borderline suicidal. If you fear you may be a narcissist, check out this post: HELP! I think I am a narcissist! If you know you are a narcissist, if you identify as a narcissist, sociopath or psychopath or have a diagnosis of NPD or ASPD, Dec 9, 2024 · I’m (24F) living out of state from my parents with my fiancé. I am 24 years old, the youngest out of 3 siblings, and the last child to cut ties with my narcissistic father. My parents never taught me about boundaries, they never taught me that I had the right to stand up for myself against other predators and abusers. When I did more research about this disorder, I realized that not only does my father have it, he is a textbook narcissist. Thier mother had great parents, neither of them was narcissistic/abusive. As I got older, my father would have me working in HIS store 6-7 days a week, after school evenings and weekends. I'm the oldest daughter too, standing up to him meant I got the worst of his behaviour. My childhood was filled emotional trauma and fear. Maybe that explains the gaping, ever-expanding void in my heart. This is obviously impossible, since there is no exponential supply of people, and they will have burned a lot of bridges, so the facade collapses. Jul 16, 2024 · Narcissistic parents may have a set of personality traits that include being self-centered and attention-seeking. My brother, who's 2. My narcissistic father made me homeless. Hello everyone, my story begins from how much my father is a narcissist self centred monster who always try to manipulate me and make me always feel like a failure. Significant others and friends are all welcome. He enables the narcissist mother because he's self-centered and doesn't empathize with his abused children. All the abuse growing up caused me to be miserable, explosive, argumentative, and just unbearable all the time. He says that grown adult children must always respect and do what their fathers say and never talk back, even if the father is in the wrong. Maybe I am wrong in my armchair diagnosis, so please correct me if it doesn’t seem right. I sometimes have to spell out what they actually did to us because I keep gaslighting myself to believe they were loving parents. Has anyone here read any good books on narcissistic parents? I am trying to identify if this is the case in my family. Your father thought you were worthless, and clearly thought your boyfriend's abuse was as justified as his own was This is a support group for people raised by abusive parents (with toxic, self-absorbed or abusive personality traits, which may be exhibited by those who suffer from cluster B personality disorders). Absurd, stupid, ridiculous instances of my father screaming, berating, taunting, and ridiculing me over what I could never figure out. After that, I was able to clue in on my boss’s narcissistic tendencies. Here, they share their stories. lvkajbcermntsephhdpzdojnqladelonpouhwmwzdgfqwkcoviwboadbbmqdhhugpcbcwiuirts